jon: so
whatchu drankin fri
aside from my baby broth
me: GROSS
jon: oh
but seriously
lets party
jon: see where the night takes us
me: will you be mad if I don't drink
jon: yes
wait
are you pregnant
me: yes
it's yours
jon: erika
for the 100th time
you cant get pregnant giving hobos beejers
so stop trying
me: but the hobo said...
wait did you just call yourself a hobo?
jon: well
sometimes i disguise myself
for the free handouts and beejers
so wait
are you not drinking for a month again
remember what that did to our friendship?
me: yeah, we have such a delicate foundation of mutual disgust and binge drinking, it must be cared for and nurtured in order to thrive
much like a rare orchid
jon: indeed
so wait
why arent you drinking
are you afraid of roofies, cuz i swear i dropped that in there on accident
me: no problem, happens all the time
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